How many times have you gotten into an argument with your child or spouse over something inconsequential just to prove you knew the facts? You know exactly what I mean. Maybe you really knew what you were talking about and you just had to prove it. Even worse, maybe it was just your opinion and you had to show them you knew more than they did.
Now ask yourself, how many times have I done the exact same thing at work? If you’re honest, the answer is too many. This is not just about choosing your battles wisely; it’s about understanding that building influential relationships is more important for long term productivity than exercising your authority or expertise.
We are frequently placed in situations where our expertise and opinion is requested. But when it differs from others, do we feel the need to arm wrestle them into accepting only what we think? Some of us spend so much time needing to prove ourselves right, we damage the relationships of real importance. In the long run, we lose our influence…a key commodity important to leadership credibility.
“I’d rather be right, than happy.” Even when we argue the facts, is the argument worth it? The price to be right is often outweighed by its cost.
I dealt with a client company whose employees were true experts in their field. We surveyed their customers to get their feedback on my client. One of several themes was the customers felt they weren’t “listened to.” The customers’ opinions did not matter because my client’s employees spent more time telling them what they needed to do…after all, they are the experts. These were no relationships of influence, just ones of power and control. All they seemed to accomplish was create unhappy customers. Thankfully, after working with the entire team of 32, they sought a new direction to change the relationships with their many customers.
“I’d rather be right, than happy.”
What about you?